Late night musings

Hello my lovelies, 

My apologies, this isn't a fashion post: it's a me post. I hit a bit of a 'milestone' if you'd like to call it that, and blocked two people from Facebook after unfollowing them on Instagram. There wasn't any actual pain or hurt when I saw the photos, but the truth is they had caused me nothing but heartache and bad memories so I figured I have nothing to lose.

I remember my friend once said, don't delete them because one day, three years down the track you're gonna wonder what he's up to and you're going to want to stalk him and have a look for yourself at 3am. The truth is, I hope my life is brilliant and bright enough that I never have to be up at 3am wondering what a pitiful person who once crushed me is doing. I never want my life to have to come to that. 

Furthermore, I hate what they have done to my friends. The people who have been supportive and loving and with me every single step of the way, but I don't want them to carry any bitterness or hate anymore. They deserve better than hating people on my behalf. 

I've mostly moved on, but the photos are like ghosts that appear and remind me of the pain, and in an instant they equally anger the people I love. So, I've said it before and I'll say it again, it isn't worth it. None of this is worth it. I know people who carry hate and anger with them after two years of the same situations happening to them, but I'm not going to be one of them. 

I think it takes a lot to rise up from a situation like this, and I am in love with the knowledge of my own strength. I want to be more than just an average person, and I'm just going to set myself goals and reach them. 

Life is beautiful, and no matter how many times I want to turn around and backtrack into my blind hatred, I'm not going to. I am so much better than that. 

Amy.